The Indian Kids Tamasha

Disclaimer- I still love kids! And I plan to have lots of em one day but definitely won’t allow them to annoy people!

Just the other day I was having a really quite nice date at a nice restaurant in Cochin. It is a charming restaurant on the roof top with a lovely panoramic view of the city. This is the last place one would bring their children to. Somehow Indian parents insist on bringing children to late night dinners at expensive restaurants and wreck everyone else’s privacy.

Chechi(okay chechi means sister in malayalam), what is this?’ I turned around to find a little kid tugging at my skirt.
‘It’s nothing baby. It’s just a fork,’ I smiled and turned to my friends.
Chechi, is this your mobile?’ the cuteness was fast fading for this brat had pulled out my mobile from my hand bag.
‘Yes it is and now would you be a good boy and give it back to me?’ I forced a smile.
After much deliberation the kid dodged me and ran with my mobile to his mother who was sitting two tables away. Politely but firmly I asked the mother if she could get me my mobile back as it was important. Instead of being apologetic she tells me kids are like this only and that I ought to be more tolerant.
I mean seriously, as much as we feel proud that our little Tintumon is an active child bursting with energy, or love to see our little Raju sing “Twinkle Twinkle”, the rest of the world is under no obligation to indulge them. Parents should stop thinking they are entitled to some special rights.
Even at the movies I happened to get seats next to a boisterous family who had bought all the junk available at the multiplex and the kids were fighting over it all through the movie despite several refills. Also each kid by turn kept wanting to go the washroom, and each time he would have to cross me. I don’t think I caught a word of what RA-One was saying!
I don’t know what we are proud of. We make monkeys of our kids. Feed them all the junk and make the world listen to them singing Jack and Jill a zillion times over, and force them to clap and cheer. So we all have sung Baa Baa Black Sheep, it has been the most natural part of our growing up, cute as it may sound it really is no rocket science.
So I think it’s time to impose a few rules, Children below the age of 4 ┬áno 5 should not be allowed entry to
-Fancy restaurants at dinner. Even if they do allow children it should clearly mention they are ‘child-friendly’ or whatever, so that the rest of us can stay away.

- At the theaters for all shows from the evening show. The parents can rent the DVD and watch it later.

- At the beauty parlours where I like to get a my head massage done without having to hear pesky kids running around and trying to handle the equipments.

I don’t have kids of my own, I am not even married. When I do I’ll ensure they follow all these rules but right now I don’t want be deprived of a good movie or a great dinner.