Posted in close to heart, m@dness

Over and done with 25

And another one bites the dust. I am supposedly one year older younger, one year wiser and one year more beautiful than I was last year. Come on, technically my new year starts tomorrow and not on Jan 1st. No prizes for guessing!

This was an important year. More important than I had ever imagined. I did so much n so much happened to me. I lost my best friend to death. I broke my heart. I failed and succeed. I saw my dad battling it out with cancer. I wrote obsessively. I scored. I prayed. I hated. I traveled. I almost got fired. I quit a lot of things. I infatuated myself with getting back in form or shape rather. I left friends behind. I made bonds that I know would last a lifetime. I experimented with my sanity. I experienced I gave up on forever.

Would I do it all over again if I get a chance? Probably not. Some seasons should never come back and this was one of those seasons.

But I’ve also learnt a lot this year. I learnt that things don’t always turn out the way you planned, or the way you think they should, and it is not necessarily a bad thing.I’ve learnt that death is inevitable.  And I’ve learnt that there are things that go wrong that don’t always get fixed or get put back together the way they were before. I’ve learnt that good people also hurt you – no matter how good they are, at some point they are bound to hurt you too and its alright. I’ve learnt that relationships are fickle. They should not be measured by how long you have known someone, but how deeply you have enjoyed.I’ve learnt that your life isn’t something that just about anyone can throw around. You have to make your life love you! I’ve learnt that some broken things stay broken, and I’ve learnt that you can get through bad times and keep looking for better ones, even when you don’t have people who love you. I have learnt that if you do put your heart and soul into something, things can get done. I have learnt that the sooner you let go, the better it is. I also learnt that you gotta fight it out sometimes.

And now I stand here in this strangely familiar city, in this not so pleasant weather, trying to find a direction. There are no familiar faces around to guide me, no matter how hard I try to look for them, but I know why that is. They are not supposed to be here. Its my time to get up myself and figure it out. Otherwise I will never learn.

But the good news is that once I get up and put myself together, work up the courage to turn the corner of the street I had been looking at for such a long time now, I will bump into a stranger(or maybe not so much of a stranger), we will smile at each other and somehow all will be well again. Its only a matter of getting up and turning around that corner. I know I’m still a little bent, a little crooked, but I can’t complain. After bearing through all kinds of abuses this year and crashing into dead ends and living through hell, I feel better now than I did a few months ago. I might have some scar tissue, but that’s alright, I’m still making progress.

Soooooo, here’s to another year of kicking and struggling and loving, and working up the nerve to take that turn and find out what’s around that corner. HEre’s hoping that my dream of finding love and being a little happy comes true atleast this year. Here’s wishing that I do a few good things and a few things right this year and here’s praying that I don’t lose out anymore on people that I love.

Happy birthday life! You definitely make 26 look goooooood!!!

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Author:

There is a deep and cosmological connection between my birth, my parent's decision to name me what they did, my profession and my education. This brings me to the conclusion that fate is predetermined and like in Hindu mythology, is written by Brahma when someone is born. Example: My name is unique. I did my grads in Psychology. I then did my masters in HR (offshoot of following all the psychos). I then did the ultimate decision of joining an MNC in ............. beat it, BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT. So, I have the concept 'MAD' in my name, my education, my choice of career and all the milestone decisions of my life. Now, is it predetermined or what ? :-D

3 thoughts on “Over and done with 25

  1. A wise nut once said “The beauty in living life lies not in fear of the future…. Happy is he who has nothing but wants everything.”

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