These days I seem to be turning into a not so social person. I have painfuly come to terms with the fact that I am not a phone person n and I guess I will never go back to being one. Yes, don’t get shocked. Over a few months now, people who have tried to call me have given up totally frustrated, sent me messages (even abusive ones) of how ‘cruel’ I am because I didn’t take their phone calls, have stopped talking to me etc. Makes you think how relationships are so dependent on phone calls nowadays. Before it used to be ‘out of sight, out of mind’ and nowadays it’s more like ‘out of telephoning, out of mind’. I love meeting people for real more than through the phone or even online. It has always been like that — provided the person and I are on the same wavelength.
Most of the times, I never pick up the phone. Reasons being:
- I’m too busy (I’m not kidding – I’m always working and my family can vouch for that)
- I’m sleeping (When I’m not working or gymming, I can be found snoring away to glory)
- I am not in the mood to talk( this is most often the real reason)
These rules however do not apply to family or besties (coz of obvious reasons :P).
Now the complaints have risen to such a high (I’m sure even our government won’t be able to compare with the number of complaints I get), that I have decided to give away my phone number to only a selected number of people now.
- People who will get this ‘weird’ trait of mine are people in the world who don’t like talking on their phones 24×7
- People who won’t be offended if I don’t pick up their calls (I wonder if they exist :D)
- People who are as weird as me, or who are as busy as me (you know, coz they are too busy to make calls themselves :P)
- People who make calls only to convey something important (aah, I love this group; their calls last only for 2-3 minutes)
When I usually tell people that I am not such a phone person, they go “heinnnnnn? not a phone person?” (rolling eyes here) and they end up thinking I’m bluffing. So now, I just convey this info and let them think what they want to without me lending them reasons on why I am this way. When you end up thinking you’re a lone rider when it comes to things like this, you meet someone who feels exactly the same about phone calls. And you tend to feel a bit better.
I am not a phone person. And not even in an oh-I’m-just-bad-at-keeping-in-touch kind of way. Although that is also true. It’s more like, ‘If this is going to be a long conversation just come over or mail me!’ But nobody gets it. They insist on complaining. I do talk on the phone. But that’s when there is something very specific to talk about (like work) or you’re a friend who desperately needs my attention or advice (although my friend Div thoroughly abuses this position) and I have to listen to you even if it is for 30 whole painful minutes, because I’m bound by the looooveee I have for you.Why is that so hard to understand? I’m just not the person you call when you’re feeling thoughtful. You know? Like ‘Hey, just called to say hi. So, what’s new?’ or ‘What’s uuuuuuuup?’ I know it’s sweet and I’m honestly, grateful. But really, nothing’s up. Nothing’s new. I’m still go to work at 7 am in the mornin, work my ass till 6, go to gym till 8, travel back, cook, eat, sleep. So the more you keep asking me that, the more I feel like my life is totally boring!I quite like mailing and texting, though. But people are always asking me to grow up when I say that. And turns out, there’s a pattern. People my age usually prefer to call. They are never seen constantly texting or chatting online. Iam not too sureof that though. Apparently, it’s a sign that you’ve waded through your silly early-twenties and reached the other, I-don’t-have-time-for-this-shit, side. Only problem is, I don’t belong in that pattern. I think talking takes a lot of effort.So texting and chatting is fine. What I don’t have, is patience for someone small-talking/whining/screaming/what’s uuuuuping very close to my ears.
So the people who decide to be friends with me, either accept that I’ll never call unless I need them, (but they are allowed to call whenever they want and I will curse and listen :)) or they hate hanging on the phone as well. It’s why Sinsin/Deeps/M and I get along so well. They do not call unless they have something important to share. I say hello and they take it from there. We hang up. I talk when I meet them. No complaints.
No small-talk related vexation. No, I-have-to-call-atleast-once-a-week-or-she’ll-be-upset type of pressure. I don’t get this ‘You never call to say hi’ complaint. I mean, if we’re lovers, it’s cute. Otherwise, I’ll call when I have something to say -exciting or depressing. But if I don’t have anything to say to you except hi, isn’t it a pointless waste of time? I mean, do we really need a pointless hi to validate our relationship? Are we that insecure about where we stand in each other’s lives that we have to say hi and find out that the other person is still on their bed?
No wonder I have very few friends.
Till next time: Do not call me if you cant keep it short and simple!